A Big Mac or Borar-jhol?

Parenthood is fun. (yipppppeeeeeeeee!!)

..But it is definitely not simple.

The complexities are not in the process of feeding, caring, changing diapers, feeding (again), changing (again).....
Parents who are in this stage please do not be angry. You have no clue what is coming after this. Enjoy the feeding and the cleaning......
;-)
The complex part is how to 'react as a parent'? Nowadays, these little (or not so little) human beings called children, just know it ALL. There is almost nothing new to add to their immense exposure through google and hence their extreme confidence of 'knowing it all'. As a parent (who claims to be a friend as well), it becomes very difficult to come up with the correct reaction which is able to balance both roles properly. In some cases, when things are assumed to be too friendly, I have to remind him I am a mother first!!

Really not that simple anymore.

I am sure my parents struggled too, in their own way....but my parents were "only parents" when I was growing up. They became "friends" much later in life. I have no complains because I am extremely glad with the end product they created. Hi Hi Hi....

Problems were different. Reactions were different too. 'Simple' reactions like "the big eyes glare" from Ma just worked like a miracle. (Believe me, my mom has real big eyes!). Those reactions do not exist anymore. Neither do those problems. But like everything else in life, struggles are also relative. Times change, struggles change, reactions change. 
However, I feel that the  'delta'  stays the same.

All those years ago, my mom struggled to keep her calm when I was late coming home from school (No mobile phones those days). She paced back and forth in the garden with her eyes fixed on the road.

I struggle when my son is late in sending me the message " I am home" on Whatsapp. I am at work and keep checking my phone (under the table) during the team meeting.

The basic concern of both mothers, even though so many years apart is still the same. No matter where technology takes you, once a parent, always a parent (even with the 'friend' cap on!).

Going back to the 'reactions of a parent'.....

Yesterday I saw A-junior doing something on our home computer. This is a Mac computer (and we payed for it with a kidney and an arm) and he was not allowed to touch it till a few months back. By allowing him to use it, I have bestowed upon him a huge sense of responsibility and trust. I keep reminding him of that whenever I get the chance! So seeing him press the keyboard with unnecessary force and indifference was not a pleasant sight for me.

Me:  "ashte ! ashte!.... taka poyshar mormo bojho, Mac ta kharap hole? " 

[ Gently!! Gently! ..Try to understand the value of money..what if the Mac is broken?"]

A-junior: I have money in my Piggy bank!!

Me: Oi diye Mac kinte parbe na!! [ You cannot buy a Mac with that money!] 

A-junior (smiling wickedly): Of course, I can!!....A BIG MAC  is only 2.97 Euros!!

I laughed a lot ! It sounded hilarious in the context of things. But am not sure whether that was the right 'reaction of a parent' ! Maybe I had my "friend" cap on......

;-))

Borar Jhol: 
Long time back Ma used to make something similar but with mustard paste...not JHOL, but JHAL. (will share recipe later). These recipes are very difficult to make these days. Too time consuming and too patience consuming. But believe me, all the pain is worth the taste at the end.
Steaming white rice with Bora-r jhol! Give it a try.
Warning: Keep enough ingredients for frying some extra boras, if needed. Do not be upset if half of them already vanish into your stomach while frying.

Ingredients:

Bora: 
2 sliced onions
1 cup gram flour
1 tbsp rice flour
1 tbsp Kalojeere (kalaunji)
1 tsp Ajwain
1 tsp red chilli powder
salt, turmeric
Oil to fry

Jhol (Curry):
2 chopped tomatoes
1 chopped onion
2 cubed potatoes
10-12 curry leaves
1 tsp mustard seeds
1 tsp grated ginger

Ready steady cook:

• In a bowl mix all the ingredients from the 'Bora'.
• Heat oil in a pan. Deep fry the bora in groups.
• Keep aside on a kitchen tissue to soak the extra oil  (this step really helps making you guilt free). 
• In a separate pan add one table spoon oil.
• Add the mustard seeds and chopped chillis. Let them sizzle for a while.
• Add the onion. Fry for a while. Add the potatoes, grated ginger and the curry leaves.
• Cook till the potatoes become light brown in colour. Add chopped tomatoes.
• Add salt and turmeric. 
• Cover and cook on low heat till potatoes are cooked. 
• Add a cup of water and bring to a boil.
• Add the bora (pakoras) and switch off the heat. Cover it for a while.
• Add a small spoon of ghee before serving.(Optional) 
• Serve hot with rice.